"Momma, I'm movin' to Alaska."
"What?! Are you outta your pea-pickin' mind?"
long after this heated conversation, I came across the following comical rundown of Alaskans' approach to weather. Of course, I
promptly sent it to my Mom. She was not
- At 65°F ABOVE zero: People in Florida turn on the heat. People in Alaska plant gardens.
- At 60°F: People in California shiver uncontrollably. People in Alaska sunbathe.
- At 50°F: Italian and English cars won't start. People in Alaska drive with the windows down.
- At 40°F: People in Georgia don coats, thermal underwear, gloves, and wool hats. People in Alaska throw on a flannel shirt.
30°F: New York landlords finally turn up the heat. People in Alaska have the last cookout before
it gets cold. (I can attest to this.)
- At 0°F: People in Arizona fly away to Mexico. People in Alaska get out their winter coats.
- At 10°F BELOW zero: Hollywood disintegrates. Girl Scouts in Alaska are selling cookies door to door.
- At - 20°F: Washington, D.C. runs out of hot air. People in Alaska let the dogs sleep indoors.
- At - 30°F: Santa Claus abandons the North Pole. Alaskans get upset because they can't start the snowmachine.
- At - 40°F: ALL atomic motion stops. People in Alaska start saying, "Cold enough for ya?"
- At - 50°F: Hell freezes over. Alaska public schools will open two hours late.
Please note: I am not the author of the above bullet points; just merely reposting as I think y'all will get a kick out of it. Right now, it's a balmy 27°F in Juneau. And I'm wearing flip-flops.